i love you.

Today a friend of mine told me that i never say "I love you" and of course she is right i don't. i have trouble saying those three, tiny words. I can't figure out why and it's driving me nuts. because their are a load of people i could say that i love. but to say it in front of them. the words just won't come out. ugh.

the other day someone told me they loved me and i went and pulled a Han Solo i said "i know". you can't see me but i'm shaking my head in disbelief. I can't believe i said that. well yes i can it's so me! haha. but still. the thought that i couldn't return the affection hurt me and i'm sure them.

what worries me is i can't even TEXT it!!! one time i said "i luv u" but i'm not sure that really counts anyway. ugh. one thing i can say is i can tell my family that i love them!! yay me!!

i think i'm gonna make a real effort to start saying the three, tiny, scary, but meaningful words. ... but of course in baby steps.. so anyone reading this don't except me to run up and tell everyone that i love you. or them! whatever.

or perhaps maybe the words i love you aren't the only way to tell someone that you, well, love them. hugs, kisses, laughing together, smiles, eating together, and well just plain spending time with people are all great ways to SHOW someone that you care without verbally expressing the way you feel towards someone. although i do think both are important.

so to close i am going to try and use words like i love you more and to not just show my love through everyday acts. which of course it is still important to use the everyday acts of kindness and love.